Find your passion….Now what the heck does that even mean?
As women with families, our first passion becomes building a home, our children, and work, PERIODT! Second, we make an attempt to look presentable-meaning, if it’s your thing to work out, you do that; if hair and nail rituals make you feel like a Queen-HAIR DONE, NAILS DONE, EVERYTHING DID, GO-but your girl doesn’t consider ANY of this self care, it's maintenance. It’s all stuff that we need to do. Of course, I would never suggest we walk around with a raggedy head or hoofs grabbing the bedsheets. See, when you look at it from that perspective, you have no choice in the matter but to do it…I'm sure while you’r getting your maintenance, Yup, you have time away from your regular responsibilities, so it provides relief from Bey-Bey’s kids, work, spouses (that work your last nerve, I get it) but sitting in the nail or hair salon IS NOT self-care.
FINE, Whatever the eff, argue with yourself. I’m trying to help you live…you don’t like my perspective…get out…✌🏽
Back to finding your passion…Haaa…I just looked at the title again. I’m ridiculous/uncouth as my mom would say. Guess what, I don’t care…someone call ☎️ and tell her…..please. Ugh-I digress.
Question: When life throws you distractions that take away from finding things you love and enjoy, how do you learn a new passion? Is it even possible? I guess this post is more of a cry for help or maybe even a rant, but my hope is that it lets someone see that they are not in this alone. Education and previous successes have not extinguished the feelings of anxiety and failure due to my inability to figure this shit out? How can it be that my only free time all these years has been limited to when I’m asleep?(Sad) I know most woman can relate to this plight; so i ask, is the expectation that passions are found while asleep and you have the AHA 💡moment as soon as you rise? Although I’m being condescending, is it impossible to pursue a passion found only in dreams? I would say yes;many of my dreams have become my reality, but that still doesn't make them passions. I'm convinced I'm doing this thing called life wrong.
For years I’ve wanted to purchase a motorcycle and join an all women’s motorcycle club, not that I think there is one in Boston but that didn’t stop my want.I also wanted to join a running club even though I’m a really slow runner who is deathly afraid of new people and an extroverted-introvert😂.
Are these desires of my heart considered passions or are they just that alone, desires? (If y'all are calling me stupid for asking the same question different ways,🖕🏽that's what I got for that.) I guess a better question, probably the same question, is what makes them passions, the yearning that I feel to pursue these new hobbies or is it the actual want, to have or do something new?
It pisses me off that people talk about finding your passion to a woman my age, that has had a fairly successful career ending as an AGM, that began as a single parent, raised a Queen who graduated with high honors and is now getting her MBA, as if this is an easy task. "Go find yourself, do something you always wanted to do. You can do anything, you're retired. BLAH BLAH 😑."
I am in the process of getting my MBA and taking 6 months off while writing you. It is as if it is unimaginable that someone has spent their time focusing on their career versus leisure. I’m almost embarrassed that I can call out that I love to read but I don’t know if that fits in the box of a suitable passion that they (Whomever the hell they are. They must sit next to he, them and her) speak of.
Retirement is hard, confusing and scary. I think it would be beneficial for us young, but not young enough; old, but not old enough- retirees, some good if folks would grant us grace to find out what it means to be retired as we find our balance. Forest G. knew what he was talking about when he said that life is like a box of chocolates because I never know what I’m going to get.
Lastly, Queens keep me in your prayers. When you pray with your kids or over your meals pray for me and my family please, we need it. If you've visited, subscribed, commented, etc. know I will do the same for you. Lets adjust our crowns together, and if you have time tell about your passion if it's something you found outside of work.
Until next time my Queens
A.L.I
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